Making Amends With a Harsh Critic

It’s inevitable when you referee as frequently as I do that you’ll eventually cross paths with a player whom you’ve sent off in a previous match. Last night it happened not once, but twice.

In the first instance it was a guy who I red-carded about a month ago for violent conduct, i.e. tackling (literally) and then punching an opponent in the head. The guilty party on that occasion was almost immediately apologetic and embarrassed that I was left with no choice but to throw him out of the game. And as I’d suspected, he presented no problems during last night’s contest.

But as his hard-fought, high-level match (that his team won 4 - 3) was coming to an end, I noticed Diego stretching out for the last game of the night. Now, for those who regularly read my posts, you’ll recall that Diego was the guy who I sent off a few weeks ago when he said “Fuck you, Baldy!” after I issued him a caution for dissent. He ultimately refused to leave the pitch, leaving me no choice but to abandon the match.

Now that he knew I wasn’t going to put with any of his bullshit, I doubted he would pose much trouble for me as the match at hand was about to get underway. And like the game before it, the teams - one made up of mostly Brazilians and the other a Latino contingent - played hard, physical ball. But I kept them in check and managed to make it through the 5 - 3 affair with very little trouble.

Diego played well, but ended up on the losing end of things, never once challenging any of my calls. It would’ve been easy enough to leave things there, but as I made my way off the pitch and past Diego’s squad, I made a point to walk over to him and extend my hand as an olive branch of sorts. When he reached his hand out to meet mine I said, “Good game.” It was my way of letting him know that what had happened a few weeks earlier is now in the past.

But Diego didn’t let go and continued to grip my hand firmly. Standing there as he sat on the bench looking up at me he apologized for his past behavior, acknowledging that he’d been completely out of line. Sensing that there was little more for either of us to discuss, I thanked him, said “No problem”, and made for the exit.

Now, I share this story with you because there are times in all of our lives when we do things that we later regret. But it takes someone with great character and humility to acknowledge and apologize for their past actions.

So cheers to you Diego! I look forward to seeing you on the pitch again sometime.

Until then…

peace,
ac